You have been dating somebody for quite a while now and you think that you love that person. In that case, it’s time to make some big steps. When you date somebody long enough, it eventually leads to the two of you moving in together, and ending any distance and remoteness that have been lingering up until now. This is not quite like giving a key to your flat to someone it means not having to give the key as that person will already be there, all the time. The thought is immediately exciting, because you will now have the opportunity to constantly spend time with your loved one, but there are still things that you need to think about before you start looking for a removal company for both of your relocations.
1. You need to have “the Talk”
The Talk is important as it sets things straight between the two of you. Both need to be aware of where your relationship is going and how far it can go before you start signing any papers together. This is the time for all the hard conversations about your relationship and the future. Make sure that the both of you are moving in the same direction and riding the same wave, otherwise you are just setting up an arena for future battles once you or your partner realise that living together will only be temporary.
2. Do test shared residencies
Each of you should spend a month or two living together in one of your current addresses. You need to be aware if you can both handle the lack of personal space and each other’s constant company. It still will not be the same as both of you will have the option of go to their own flats once troubles arise, but you need to know that when you move in with each other, that option will be void. Then you will have to stay and face your problems immediately or risk alienation.
3. Learn to compromise
If you have troubles with compromising, then this is where you need to deal with them. Living with someone means being able to see things from the other’s perspective and being able to make compromises. And yes, it always comes down to compromise; no shared residency has ever neglected that trial. Whether it would be for an outing, welcoming the other person’s friends who you cannot stand, cleaning the flat more often, and so on, it simply has to be done. Refusing to compromise means rejecting the other person’s need of something. And this does not mean to always compromise – find the balance.
4. Share chores
Flats and houses will always have their needs just as your relationship does. And it should not be just one of you who should deal with those needs. House chores are a shared responsibility and you have to deal with that fact. You both live in that place, so both of you should take care of it; it is as simple as that.
5. Maintain independence
And the most important part – just because you are moving in with someone does not mean completely dashing off your independence. You are still your own man or woman, you still have a need of personal space and quiet time, you will still have friends you want to talk to despite the other person’s resentment towards them, and while you should help with whatever you can, you should not over encumber yourself with the other person’s problems. Make sure you both understand that and make sure that both of you can deal with that, otherwise you are setting up each other with someone unable to feel empathy and will always think that his or her life will always depend on them, and this is how you start taking people as a given.
Assess these points and make sure you understand what you are getting into when moving house and then sharing the new one with your loved one. Don’t be too hasty with looking for a moving company or to start the relocation. If you don’t think things through, you are only setting yourself a time-bomb, and you should not do this to either yourself or your loved one.